Change Your Narrative and Change Your Divorce! Fiction Friction
Change your narrative
There Are Three Sides to Every Divorce Story.
There are three sides to every divorce story. This side, that side, and truth.
Once you understand this, you’ll understand that Court is the worst place to be in a family law case.
Vexatious Victor was tired of being used, abused and bruised. He worked extremely hard at a desk job with no ventilation, crass single colleagues and the only snacks offered by the company was Fritos. He was in high-tech, but his days felt anything but. The only calls Victor received were when someone’s email server was down inevitably due to porn, or during mercury retrograde, when the internet was down.
He hated his life, but he hated his wife even more. He married Golddigger Greta 10 years ago when his career was on an upward spike, and he was set to earn more than $100,000 a year. Golddigger Greta recently met Paul the Pansy Polo Pro and is having a torrid affair in front of him.
Victor had two children who adored both him and his golddigging wife, but they were often left to their own devices (ipads and computers) while she was bangin Paul, and Victor was downloading Porn.
Golddigger Greta didn’t used to have to golddig, because they had a lot of money in the stock market. But in 2008, their dreams were shattered when Bear Stearns went under, and now they live off whiskey and Twinkies. Victor didn’t understand why Greta was on Tinder and eating Ho-Hos when she could be getting a job to help with the bills. Great didn’t understand why Victor kept going to a job he hated. He used to be a dreamer and take her out dancing. Now he yells at her, even on Prime Day, when she only spent $1000 of the money they didn’t have, but at least it was for allegedly $2000 of merchandise. They were both losers, but their children were Godsends. Their eventual marital demise depleted their substantial savings account, leaving them with nothing.
Victor was tired of his desk job where he was a high-tech engineer at Google. He was surrounded by a lot of bright, young graduates from Caltech and MIT, and he loved the time he spent with them. Victor had a cubicle instead of an office, but the cubicle allowed a lot more interaction with his brilliant colleagues than a private office down the hall. He felt so lucky to selected from a wide pool of candidates, and he said a prayer every day after he kissed his wife, who packed his lunch, and drove into work.
His beautiful wife Greta was a hard-working woman who was previously a divorce lawyer. She outearned all her male colleagues due to her unending ability to listen to the most lugubrious divorce stories without breaking into sarcastic comments. Though she worked with the bottom-feeders of society, she enjoyed her job, had purpose and loved every minute of it. She invested a lot of money in the stock market, in 2007, only to lose 98% of it in 2008.
However, Victor and Greta had each other, and they drank wine together and always kissed while their 2 lovely children chowed on Twinkies, clapping their hands at the apparent show of affection. The children longed to have a marriage some day like their parents. The stock market eventually rebounded, and world peace also came, which destroyed all need for computers and divorce lawyers, and Victor and Greta lived happily retired ever after, playing Strip Poker on Wednesday nights, and swimming under the stars on Sunday nights. With wine.
I am not saying that every narrative can be as ridiculous as that apparent vomit of creative writing I just did above. But I am saying you can change the way you view things.
Instead of – I am ENTITLED to half of EVERYTHING!
You should be saying, “Can he/she survive on this? I want to make sure they are also provided for.”
Instead of – I want to DESTROY/KILL/POISON/PUT NAIR IN HER SHAMPOO
You should be saying, “Damn I am super mad right now. I need to go do joyful things like running, yoga, singing Karaoke, playing Powerball lottery and hopefully this will pass.”
Instead of “you are a cheater and a liar!”
Maybe after that think, “That cheater and liar showed me his true colors and now i can be on my own”.
Instead of “You better pay me alimony for the rest of your life”
Maybe think “How can I support myself because I know I am good enough to make my own money instead of relying on HIM/HER to support me?”
Instead of “I hate my divorce lawyer who is doing SHIT for me”
Maybe read my article on how attorneys suffer caretaker/compassion fatigue and catch up on paying your bills?
Whenever you feel negative and bad, I highly recommend that you get lost in a movie like Shawshank Redemption. There, you find a hard-working man who loved his beautiful wife. She cheated on him with a golf pro and then some random burglar shot both of them to death. The hard-working man got convicted for 2 murders he did NOT commit, and spent 20 years in prison where he was raped, beaten and deprived of any freedom. If Andy Dufrene didn’t think of himself as a victim, you certainly don’t. You are NOT a victim.
There are many stories that like, some are real, some are fiction. What you are going through is awful, and I want to get you through it. So help change your narrative. It will change your life.